Pride's Purge

(satire?)

By our Chief Economic Editor

Official inflation of the Chancellor George Osborne’s ability to run the economy unexpectedly fell to a dramatic new low in December when incredibly the Bank of England announced the UK economy was improving for the first time in four years.

A smaller rise in dubious claims of growing prosperity have offset a surge in assertions of far-fetched improvements in living standards, economists said, and recent increases in supplies of intolerance have seen stocks of spin, lies and disinformation reach their lowest point in three years, with shares in truth and integrity also rapidly falling. 

The surprise fall in realistic assessments of the cost of living drove the consumer incredulity index to its highest level since November 2009, when it stood at 1.9% – just a tenth of a percentage point short of you-couldn’t-make-this-shit-up – the Office for National Statistics reported yesterday.

Recent figures also show levels…

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